Random Act of Running

By Lada Tatyana Lysniak

I don't believe in marathons. They should be outlawed. NOT because I can't run the distance - I have run & won many a 5k, 10k, even half marathons - but I believe the human body was not made to run 26.2 miles. I feel quite strongly about this. Like some people don't eat meat because its cruel to animals, I don't run the marathon because it is cruel to human beings. But nevertheless in 2001 I decided to run the NYC marathon. Why? What would make a vegetarian put a piece of steak in their mouth and swallow it?

Plain and simple - The heroes of the WTC . . .

While I was running my usual morning 5k I was trying to think of a way to help at Ground Zero: What could I do to help the firefighters? Volunteer? Donate time, food? What do I do uniquely well? Hey, what I am doing now? Running.

I could run in place for one of those fallen firefighters who was planning to run the marathon. As I thought of it I felt it was exactly the right thing to do. My soul was in agreement. My ego and principles protested, but it was the thing to do.

Give my legs to the spirit of a fireman that gave up his life to save others. I was sacrificing nothing compared to that.

It was October 9th - three weeks to go to the marathon. Could I get in? Many might have dropped the idea, thinking it is too late. It is never too late - for the right thing.

That evening on my usual walk to Penn Station from work I decided to follow some firemen who were all dressed up in their uniforms - a familiar sight these days - who most likely were going to a funeral or memorial. I figured I might be able to talk to some people at a memorial about running in place of a firefighter who perished at WTC.

The route they took was directly past Ladder Co. 4's firehouse. New Yorkers had placed flowers, candles and memorials by the entrance. They lost 4 firefighters at Ground Zero. I let the firemen that I was following go on. They seemed to have lead me to this firehouse. Ss we walked by I just seemed to be drawn in. I approached this older fireman who had a bit of a sad smile in his eyes and asked if any of those firefighters who had perished were planning to run the marathon? He said "Yeah, Mike Brennan was a runner. . . and I think he was planning to run the marathon. . ."

I asked if they knew who I needed to contact if I wanted to run for him? After several of the firemen tried to pick me up - they wouldn't be NYC firemen if they didn't - one firefighter, Al Shwartz (probably the only jewish fireman in New York) was extremely helpful and made a few phone calls for me and gave me the name and number of the marathon coordinator for the FDNY. I called him the next day and he said he will see what he could do. He called me back with another number and I left a message on a machine.

In the days that followed I heard nothing. At that point I said to myself, "If I am meant to run for him, it will take care of itself . . . " I mean, how possible is it to get in two weeks before the marathon?

The next day I get a phone call and the woman on the other end of the phone says to me, "we have your application here. . ."

Okay, I'm in . . . two weeks to go?

That's when the magnitude of what I was about to undertake hit me. I am going to run 26.2 miles! I DO NOT DO MARATHONS! I don't believe in them !!!

Its too late - I'm in ..................... But will I be ready?

I am a runner: I run 5 miles a day but for the last 6 months or so have been doing long runs on the weekends, 10, 15 even a 20 - like I'm in training for a marathon. Why? No real reason - I guess I was supposed to be getting ready for this?

When I went to pick up my number at the Jacob Javits Center I thought I might be off the hook: My name was not in the official book. But when the guy who was helping me went in the back to ask the head coordinator about me she peeked her head out from behind the curtain, smiled at me and said, "Oh yes - Lada Lysniak - yes she is in. We know about her."

I thought to myself, who knows about me and what do they know? Geez, I guess there is no backing out now!!

As the guy was handing me my number he shook his head and said that it is really unusual. " I've worked here 10 years and have never seen so late an entry. . ."

The night before the race I didn't sleep very well . . . not because I was nervous, but excited. And not worried cause I asked Michael to be there with me. Somehow I knew he would be.

Now . . . another reason I don't believe in marathons is the ungodly hour that they expect you to arrive . . . The last bus for the Verrazano bridge leaves the New York City Library at 7:00 a.m. That means getting up at 5:00 a.m. after no sleep, traipsing into the city and then being at the start 3 hours before it starts! Why?

But the weather more than made up for it. It was a beautiful crisp morning, warm and clear much like the day of the World Trade Center attack. How odd.

Walking toward the bus from Penn Station I felt peaceful and in sync.

At the buses there was a feeling of anticipation of the embarking on a shared unspoken goal among the runners. To honor those who have died in the WTC attack and show the terrorists that we might be running . . .. . but not away . . .

My sister was also running. Her 10th NYC marathon. She is connected to the NYFD so their buses leave at 8:30 a.m. - a little bit more sane. And they have a different waiting area (probably inside) so I figured I would not be running with her .

But obviously Michael thought otherwise . . .

By 10:00 a.m. - the start is at 10:50 a.m. - we started lining up on the bridge. She told me to try to get up to the front of the red holding area on the bridge and me being the pushy, reporter type managed to get fairly close but couldn't find her. This is where Mother Nature stepped in - I had to pee. I saw all the guys jumping over the median to relieve themselves on the other side of the bridge which was all cops and security, so I jumped over the median and joined them. As I was walking back to the other side, guess who I spot? My sister. Okay so I found her among 30,000 other people?

We began the race together and as clearly as my spirit told me to run in place of a firefighter, that same voice told me: You finish with her. Hands up in victory at the finish line.

It wasn't easy . . . My sister & I have a competitive, fairly close but contentious relationship. Our egos keep getting in the way. I am a faster runner than she is and I would have loved to have rubbed it in her face! But there was no me and her as it usually is - just us.

I kept wanting to go ahead but that voice kept saying no, you stay right by her side. She needs you. And I needed her. Being a veteran she knew how to run the race: Don't start out too fast; drink the water at every mile; avoid the Gatorade till the the 20th mile. She knew all the tricks and this made the difference.

But she was hurting. Told me at one point she wanted to slow down - walk a little. At that point I grabbed her hand (mile 15) and didn't let go. She said she needs me - she has never said that to me before and it brought tears to my eyes. That was all I needed to hear. I have never felt so close to my sister as I did those several hours it took to run that race. That experience seemed to have melted so much scar tissue between us like nothing else could not even words.

For me, the 26.2 miles were effortless - what the heck are all you marathoners complaining about? What's a hill? What 20 mile wall are you talking about? After I had a bit of that carbo gel and a band by the road was playing New York, New York at mile 18. I made my sister do chorus line kicks with me as we ran!! What is in that stuff? ?

But I knew it wasn't the carbo gel that was giving me this boundless energy - it was my purpose of being there. I was running for Michael and he was running for me. His angel wings were on my back that day and my feet were not touching the ground. This run was not about me. It was about everyone else and that's why it was so easy. I didn't get in my own way. My ego wasn't there that day and that's why I got so much out of it - I was in the flow. Life in the flow is effortless.

In this state of mind we glided over the finish line. Hands up and together - all three of us: Me, my sister and Mike . We finished in 4:26:19 . . . quite respectable but I could have easily done it in 3:40 ish or less - sorry couldn't help it (can't I have a little ego?)

Mike gave me a lot with this race. Besides the healing experience with my sister he really helped me overcome a major stumbling block in my life: FEAR - I built up this marathon to be this difficult and daunting task but I just did it without much thought and it was easy!!! And this carries over into life - we build things up and make them so daunting when we should just do them. So when FEAR comes around I just think of Mike and the marathon and that gives me the push I need. I CAN DO ANYTHING!!!!! At least try it - don't let Fear hold me back.

The race and all I learned from it was Mike's gift to me . . . BUT after I crossed the finish line it was Mike's turn. It became clear to me in the subsequent days why Mike chose me . . . and of that I am sure.

After I got my medal I began thinking to myself, "now how am I going to get this to Mike Brennan's family? " After all this was his run, not mine. I felt a tap on my shoulder and this pretty young woman pointed to the sign on my shirt "F.F. Mike Brennan - Ladder company 4 " "Do you know Mike? I said no - but I am running the race for him. Its all his fault that I am here. I don't know him at all . Why? "

"I am his cousin. . ."

She starts to cry, I start to cry, my sister starts to cry. . . we are all bawling.

We talked a bit about Mike. I knew nothing about him . . . didn't need to. He was 27, single, no girlfriend, lived with Mom, big family. I then took the medal off my neck and put it on hers. "Please give this to his mother. Mike ran this race not me - I was just the legs for his spirit."

More crying but then here comes the even stranger part . . . Brenda, his cousin, lives in my town on Long Island, Manhasset. Her mother, Mike's aunt, was at the hair salon telling Anthony the hairdresser the story of how a stranger ran for her nephew in the race and even gave the medal to her sister - (Mike's mother). And my hairdresser said, "I know that girl - that's Lada Tatyana ! I do her hair!"

This is too weird:First his cousin finds me and sees my little sign out of 30,000 people. And if I hadn't waited for my sister I never would have met her. And then she lives in the same town. There are no such things as coincidences.

Since the race I have called and spoken to Brenda and her mom. They sent me flowers, thanking me for running for a stranger, and I tell them Mike was and is no stranger. I think forever he will be by my side - giving me the push I need to just be in the Flow !

As for Mike's family, his message to them was that he is and will be forever closer than they all think. Right in the neighborhood. 3 streets away.

And as for my opinion about marathons. . . Well, with a running partner like Mike by my side we might tackle Boston next!